Thursday, 2 February 2012

Chloe's 100 word challenge - Week#19

As I walked slowly towards my house, I realised the ground was beginning to wobble. At first I thought I was imagining it, so I carried on walking. Arriving home, I went in and saw that the floor of my house was cracked and most fo my things had fallen through the hole. I ran as fast as I've ever ran in my life the find my parents, but it seemed they had gone too.

That's when it came to me: this wasn't just a nightmare. The ground slowly parted...

By Chloe.
Ash Class, Year Five - Greenfields Primary School.
Posted by at 19:55
Labels: ,

13 comments:

  1. Olusola (Team100wc)2 February 2012 at 21:49

    Hi Chloe, I hope you were able to locate your parents.
    You used your imagination so well and gave a good description of what was taking place. I wish to know what happened next. I guess you wanted to type 'of' instead of 'fo' and 'to find my parents instead of 'the find...In any case, you did well. Keep entering for 100wc.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Chloe3 February 2012 at 10:04

      Thank you for commenting my 100 word challenge. I hope I will be able to do more of them.

      Delete
  2. Ash3 February 2012 at 08:30

    Thanks Olusola! I'm afraid Chloe's typos were my fault (Mr Kenyon, her teacher!) - I shouldn't try to speed type!!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Sally-Jayne (Team 100WC)4 February 2012 at 17:18

    Hi Chloe. I enjoyed reading your 100WC. You have used some great openers and some interesting punctuation. To make it even better, maybe next time you could add some emotions - how did you feel when you realised your parents had gone?

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  4. Mrs Halford (Team100WC)5 February 2012 at 21:12

    Hello Chloe (snap! Your class name matches mine!) You built up some effective suspense. The description of the ground wobbling was great. I think you have excellent imagination. Keep on writing. Next time try some more description of feelings, sights and sounds.

    ReplyDelete
  5. jfb577 February 2012 at 20:43

    Hello Chloe!
    I really like this story especially as you left putting the prompt in until the very end! It is super to see you on the 100WC!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Anonymous9 February 2012 at 20:01

    Hello chloe!
    Great 100 word challenge
    I really enjoyed reading it
    Well done
    Sasha

    ReplyDelete
  7. football1769 February 2012 at 20:17

    cool story

    ReplyDelete
  8. Isaac-AKA-SilverFox380210 February 2012 at 19:02

    Its kinda scary! :-0

    love the fact you made me want to read on!

    ReplyDelete
  9. chloeot11 February 2012 at 09:20

    glad you enjoyed the story
    thanks for commenting

    ReplyDelete
  10. chloe12 February 2012 at 18:05

    hi mr k
    i am in blackpool and have been looking at the blog

    love chloe

    ps: great result for Man City, two points clear at top of the league now!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ash12 February 2012 at 18:09

      Hi Chloe - excellent, hopefully there'll be a dot on Blackpool on our globe!
      Mr K
      ps - boo, hiss at Man City!

      Delete

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